Saturday, October 20, 2012

Jason (Monologue)

   Here's a monologue I wrote last year for a theater class. I got it from a ton of videos I found online and from someone I actually met. His name was Jason, hence the title. Jason is a 12-13 year old schizophrenic living in a psychiatric ward.


I was a baby when my parents knew something was wrong with me.
They say I would stare at things they couldn’t see.
When I got older, it got worse.
I would hurt myself.
Everyday I saw heard or felt things that didn’t exist.
I tried not to listen to them, but
they threatened me.
They said they would kill me if I didn’t do what they said.
When I was nine, I wanted it to stop.
I was tired of suffering and hurting myself and others.
I tried to kill myself.
I was put into a hospital for a couple of weeks.
The doctors wouldn’t let me out of their sight.
They tried different medicines to help me but none of them worked.
The voices and visions became more frequent.
The nurses had taken away everything I could hurt myself with.
I was so desperate, that at night when they thought I was asleep,
I would furiously rub the backs of my hands on the carpet.
This would leave big burns on my hands.
Even now, three years later in a different hospital,
I do the same thing.
The medication I take helps me stay in control, but
the voices are still there.
Last night they yelled at me.
I was in the common room before bed with the other patients.
Ghostlike visions filled the room all yelling at me to hurt others.
In a state of terror, I started throwing chairs at the other kids.
They tried to calm me down but my body was no longer in my control.
Nurses ran in and took me to an empty room.
They gave me a shot that made me sleep for a long time.
My parents discussed long term care with my family.
Tomorrow I will be permanently moved to another hospital.
The only thing I have to comfort me when I am scared is other kids.
They are the only ones who truly understand what I’m going through.
(pauses...gets scared)
I’m tired now.
I want to leave.
That man over there, he’s trying to kill me! 

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